5 1/2 Months And Then Some

When Barrett was about a week old I wrapped him up safe and sound and cozy in my moby wrap and Kyle and I took him for a walk in the park near our house. He was just a little potato with arms and he slept the entire time, his little baby nose making the sweetest squeaky noise with each breath he took. He was SO tiny. And SO cute. I just wanted time to stand still forever. As we walked around the park, we came across another couple with a little baby boy. He was HUGE! Smiling and playing in his mommy's arms; looking around, grabbing at her hair. He was like a little person. I asked how old he was and the mom told me 5 1/2 months. My heart broke to think of Barrett ever being that old. I was still counting his age in days.

Barrett will be 6 months old next weekend. He's as old (or older!) as that little boy we saw in the park. I love how aware and alert and interested he is now. I love the way he "chats" and picks up toys. I love his giggles. I love the way his face lights up when he sees me. I love watching him watch people. I love the way his eyes pop open in the morning and he grins instantly - ready to take on the day... but I miss him being tiny. I miss the squeaky nose. I miss him sleeping on me all day long. I miss watching him struggle and stretch and yawn and squirm, trying so hard to wake up while seeming to think that sleep is so nice and maybe I'll just stay asleep for 5 more minutes mommy.

It's very bittersweet.

Now when we're out in the world and we come across a couple with a brand new baby I wonder if they wonder about how old Barrett is. And I wonder if they secretly pray that time will freeze and that their little one will stay tiny and new forever.

I'm sure they do.